Working Mama?

I can see I'll have to drop "weekly" from this title, at least for now as it's been almost an entire year since I've posted a blog here............but anyway........

........Much has happened in this last year, but the most important has remained the same. I am still a working mama with aspirations to make it as a success in the world of writing. I haven't quite figured out the "how" yet as it turns out to be very difficult to juggle all of my aspirations and keep balance in my life, but I will not cease working on it as it's very important to me. In the last year I've written about half of the sequel to the novel that I published and I've also written about half of another unrelated title. I plan on finishing both within the next year, maybe even six months, but that is quite a stretch so I should probably stick to the year.

Writing is in the very heart of me and it's something I will always do even if I have but a few readers to share it with. Until next time!

Weekly Working Mama

For those of us that work through a lot of our babies "firsts" please know that the first time they do something and the first time you witness it are incredibly different things.
Babies all progress at their own rate and there are always things that we can't wait to see our little ones do. For me, it's crawling. My son didn't crawl and though there's nothing wrong with skipping that particular milestone, I'm still excited to see my daughter crawl.

The other day I said to my husband, "look she's up on all fours" in excitement because I know that means that she'll be crawling soon and his response, "oh, she's been doing that for a while." Sometimes I wish he'd keep that particular thing to himself, but still, I know it's just as special to me the first time I witness her do something new, even if someone else saw it first.

A good way to go about this is to ask your care provider not to tell you if your LO does something for the first time. It's inevitable that there will be something they do for the first time that you won't see, but if you don't know about it, you're none the wiser. Or, like me, accept that you're not going to see everything for the first time and be happy that they are making these progressions. It's special every time they do it.

Weekly Working Mama #4

So it occurs to me that all the tried and true methods of potty training can become very difficult when you're away from home for a good part of each day. For example, "Keep them in underwear and watch for their clues, when you see one, put them on the potty." Well, that's great except if you can't spend extended periods of time with them, it's hard to do this just at night or on the weekends and as much as we'd all love to believe that our caretakers do everything that we ask of them exactly as we ask, the reality is they often don't for a myriad of reasons. You have to be okay with doing what you can when you have control over it so I suggest setting up a reward system that the caretaker can get in on too. If your child uses the potty every time with no accidents, give them a treat when you get home. If there's only one accident but every other time worked out well, give a smaller treat. Don't punish or ridicule for accidents, just say, "well, you had a few accidents. We can't celebrate tonight, but we can try again tomorrow."

What are some things you have tried?

Weekly Working Mama #3

Choosing Schools for your Little Ones

No matter where you live there are going to be choices to be made as you're getting your little one's to start preparing for school. Some have been in a daycare from birth and have already been introduced to "school" as a learning institution that is outside of the home. Many others have not. Either they've been home with a babysitter, nanny, or Daddy and have, of course, learned things, but will enter the world of "school" for the first time. Either way, where your child begins and his/her educational experience is an extremely important decision with a lot of facts to be weighed. So, as a working mom how do you find the time to gather facts and visit schools without using up all of your vacation/sick days?

One of the first things you can do is keep your eyes and ears open for Open Houses at the school. Many of these events are held on the weekend or in the evening to accomodate working families. If there is no Open House scheduled or you can't make the times, call and ask for a persoanl tour. You will find that most schools are accomodating to those that they may be getting tuition from over the next school year.

Another thing that can help you make your decision is to ask around. In your circle of friends and acquaintances chances are that some have children that are the same age or older. Ask them what experiences they've had and what schools they recommend. Be sure to find out why they favor one school over another as we all have preferences.

One final thing that you can do is visit a classroom while it's in session. There's no proof like what you can see with your own two eyes. If you like what you see in that visit, stick around and ask the teacher about the curriculum. As much as it would be convenient, you cannot trust the internet and other pieces of writing to give you all the information that you need.

Weekly Working Mommy #2

One issue that is greatly touching my heart right now is what to do when it comes time to enter your little one in school for the first time. Many working mommies already have their children in daycare and that helps make the transition to school a smooth one. For those like myself that were lucky enough to have a mother-in-law and mother that worked their schedules around mine in order to babysit, we are facing school for the first time at four years old (preschool). My little one has had some daycare so it won't be completely new, yet going somewhere that does not include his baby sister or his cousins three days a week will, at first, be a bit disconcerting to him.

I am starting with soccer. He is now enrolled to play soccer this spring so this will give him the chance, again, to acclimate himself to being around other children and also how to work in a team setting. The more that you can get your little one out of the house and around others, the easier it will be for him/her to transition into the school setting.

So, what have you done to prepare your little ones?

Weekly Working Mommy #1

This is my first blog post in this series. This will be repeating and is specifically designed for those that work outside of the home. I am part of several "mommy" boards and groups and most of them are designed more for stay at home moms. I would like to make something that is for those of us that work whether it be part or full time, you are working outside or inside the home and your children are in the care of others.

My first topic in this series is one I've heard a lot about from moms that are about to go back to work for the first time. This would be the issue of guilt over leaving your children and returning to the workplace while trusting someone other than yourself to care for your children. There are two things that I wish to respond with.

First of all, it's important that you remember that what you're doing will allow you to financially provide for your family (or at least help). This is incredibly important in the grand scheme of things so don't think of it as time away from your child/children. Rather, see it for what it is, time spent providing for them and their future.

Next and just as important, someone once said to me, "it's not so much the amount of time you spend with your children, more importantly is the quality of time that is being spent." That's not to say that you should spend ten minutes with your kids and the rest of your time on your stuff. What it means is that though those of us that work have less time to spend with our children, what we do with them when we are with them is more important than ever. Those are the things they are going to remember. Making sure that your children feel loved and supporting them in their interests is what we should all be aiming for.

There are many ways in which to raise children and we all have to work within our limitations. There are days that I wish I could be home with my children all the time, but I know that that is not feasible and I have made my peace with it. What are some of the hardest parts for you working away from your children? What are some of the benefits?

Frustrated

So I've been in between "traditional" authors and "self-published" authors all day and it's very interesting to see the amount of negativity toward self publication from the traditionalists.

In my opinion, if I wrote something that I believe is quality enough to be read and received well by the public, I should be able to put it out there. Thanks to companies like Createspace, that day is finally here. Every person should be able to be proud of their craft and if what they put out there is not received well, so be it. That's the chance that every author takes, agented and with a publisher or not. Landing an agent and getting into a publishing house gives you a better chance of being more widely received by the reading public, but it is by no means the ONLY WAY!

I was told, more or less, that it is and that since I've chosen to believe in myself and put my own work out there, my work must be of poor quality. Ha! I've written and edited the work myself. I have labored over this novel and will I have made some mistakes? Possibly, but that is also how I will learn and improve my craft. So I just wanted to get this off of my chest.